William Ralph Inge

Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter.

Originality is undetected plagiarism.

A nation is a society united by a delusion about its ancestry and by a common hatred of its neighbours.

We have enslaved the rest of the animal creation, and have treated our distant cousins in fur and feathers so badly that beyond doubt, if they were able to formulate a religion, they would depict the Devil in human form.

I am afraid the clergyman's God is often the head of the clerical profession.

Anxiety is interest paid on trouble before it is due.

Nature takes away any faculty that is not used.

What we know of the past is mostly not worth knowing. What is worth knowing is mostly uncertain. Events in the past may roughly be divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter.