Doug Larson

A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing pole.

There are worse things than getting a call for the wrong number at 4 AM. It could be the right number.

The reason people blame things on previous generations is that there's only one other choice.

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enought to know they were impossible.

If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend.